For Christmas I wanted to give some gifts.
A train for Cindy, and a doll for Cliff.
Two days before, the Santa man came,
I got a letter from him, that said I'm to blame
A fridge for Timmy, a boy of four
and a gun for Judy, For Mitchell, some chores?
These gifts are not good, and to think they're right,
Is a gross misunderstanding of the Christmas tree light.
I tried again, and went to the store.
Returning the items took me 2 days, plus four
I came back and gave, some presents around
To Cindy a maggot, and for Cliff, some ground.
Timmy got a bottle, full of Nyquil
And Judy got some glass, that got into, Mitchell.
The second time came, and the gift audit came out,
It turns out I give presents like a retarded fat goat.
If I'm to give presents, Saying 'no' I'll begin.
Be grateful for SOMETHING, and don't ask me again.
Santa is what Satan calls himself when he tries to trick us. I for one don't truck with demonology. Or pagan idolatry. F-
ReplyDeleteExcept the night of Walpurgis. That's okay stuff.
ReplyDeleteSo true oh great oso one... I researched the subject and found this:
ReplyDeleteThe Top Ten Reasons Why Santa Is Actually Satan.
1 - Santa is an anagram of Satan.
2 - Both like to live in extremes of temperature (Santa at the North Pole, Satan in Hell's eternal fire and brimstone).
3 - Both know whether you have been naughty or nice
4 - If you're bad, Santa gives you a lump of coal, Satan make you sit on burning coal.
5 - Satan has his horned minions and helpers, Santa has his reindeer and elves.
6 - Both appear dressed in red.
7 - Santa is known as Saint Nick, Satan is known as Old Nick.
8 - Both exist in ancient legends from many cultures.
9 - Santa is real .... so is Satan.
10 - Both try to attract young children to them, Santa with presents, Satan with promises of wicked fun.