The Truth Doesn't Listen

I learned my lesson, long ago.
Actually, only in the last 10 minutes.

My lesson was to never diet,
Actually it was to diet sometimes.

Then I learned how awesome I am
Except when I'm in the company of terrorists.

I told everyone that I didn't eat the yogurt
When I merely absorbed it with diffusion

I told everyone that I was immovable,
But just this morning I walked to the shower

I told everyone that I was clear-minded
When actually my brain is full of grey matter.

I also assumed people knew my name
But I wasn't wearing my name-tag at the seminar.

It turns out that you should tell the truth
Except when the truth won't listen.